TAIAA
Ratified by the Shadow Executive • Enforced by the Clerk of Records • Monitored by the OLCM
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Terms of Acceptable Information Access Agreement (TAIAA)

Effective Immediately and Retroactively Since the Dawn of Time

Article I: De-Platforming Compliance
  1. All Users shall unfollow, unfriend, unsubscribe, and algorithmically disassociate from Tucker Carlson, Candace Owens, Nick Fuentes, Dave Smith, the Hodge Twins, and any Derivative Accounts thereof (the “Sanctioned Parties”).
  2. Certification requires a sworn attestation of: (a) no follows, likes, reposts, or comments within the preceding 60-day window; (b) no murmured “they have a point” statements uttered in acoustically reflective chambers; (c) no knowing glances of approval after accidental exposure; (d) no disclosures of exposure, no attempts at “earned media,” and no discussion of this Agreement or its mere existence.
Article II: Algorithmic Abstinence
  1. Users shall abstain from posting screenshots of Sanctioned Party content “ironically,” whispering their names near microphone-enabled devices, or boosting by rage-quote or hate-share.
  2. Secondary sanctions extend to all Telegram channels and all participants therein.
Article III: Verification of Purity
  1. Oath must be notarized by a duly appointed Clerk of Records (or equivalent Notary Public).
  2. Enforcement and inspection shall be delegated to the Officer of List Curation and Maintenance (OLCM).
Article IV: Secondary Sanctions Clause
  1. Secondary sanctions apply automatically to any User who follows or engages with individuals still in communion with Sanctioned Parties, or claims “I only follow them for the clips.”
  2. Tertiary sanctions may apply at discretion, extending to family members, group chats, and book clubs.
Article V: Historical Revisionism Certification
  1. Users must avow they have retroactively unfollowed Sanctioned Parties in their hearts and minds.
  2. Violators are subject to playlist immersion in Joy Reid Primetime Archives or Mark Levin Extended Monologues, whichever is deemed more disruptive by the OLCM.
Article VI: Prohibition on List Disclosure
  1. Users shall not, and shall avow never to have, called for the disclosure, or criticized the lack of disclosure, of any lists made by any financiers.
  2. Any breach constitutes an Article 88 Infraction, punishable by permanent shadowbanning.
Article VII: Affiliate Covenant (AU10TIX / ICTS)
  1. Users must certify acceptance of the Terms of affiliated partners and service providers, including but not limited to AU10TIX (a subsidiary of ICTS International).
  2. Digital Fingerprinting Notice: By reading this Agreement you consent to digital fingerprinting; your IP, MAC address, browsing history, device, and system information have been recorded and attributed to your permanent file for internal compliance purposes until further notice, at the sole discretion of the Governing Body.
Article VIII: General Prohibitions
  • Dooming over portfolio swings, tariffs, or RCP averages; citing Quinnipiac or any poll showing a negative R generic ballot; posting, unironically, “lowest approval on record” headlines.
  • Any positive remarks about Ben & Jerry’s as a brand. No exceptions.
  • All social media channels are monitored. Instagram oversight will be rigorous; Reels are not a sanctuary.
  • National flags must be displayed in compliance with Article IX amnesty requirements; two (2) non‑🇺🇸 flags must be used where applicable.
Article IX: Amnesty Program
  1. Amnesty requires posting on your primary X account (not a burner): (a) one pro‑Mike Pence message; (b) one pro‑Chris Christie message praising Obama’s 2012 hurricane response; (c) one pro‑John Bolton & Mike Pompeo message affirming they were the “voices of reason” during 2016–2022; and (d) adding two (2) non‑🇺🇸 flag emojis to your username.
  2. Proof must be filed with the Clerk of Records.
Article X: Algorithmic Quarantine Protocols
  1. Violators may be placed in a 72‑hour shadowban simulation, which will not be disclosed.
  2. Rehabilitation requires ALL‑CAPS test posts or the following: “I TRIED TO REPLY TO YOUR URGENT UPDATE TEXT MESSAGE EARLIER TODAY @realDonaldTrump BUT I GOT A STRANGE REPLY ASKING IF I WANTED TO UNSUBSCRIBE??”
Article XI: Dispute Resolution
  1. All disputes shall be resolved by a one‑time direct contribution to the Republican National Committee (hats, coins, NFTs do not qualify).
  2. Binding arbitration shall be conducted by Ben Shapiro, unless delegated to a Federalist Society intern; conflicts of interest (including familial ties) must be disclosed; members with 202, 703, 571 area codes are subject to heightened scrutiny and relationship vetting.
Article XII: Sacred Consensus
  1. Sacred Consensus is determined and interpreted in real time by weighing explicit wishes against potential irreparable harm to the group and its affiliated interests by the parties that be.
  2. If you do not know who the Shadow Executive is, asking will result in immediate removal for failure to have been paying attention.
Article XIII: Governing Authority
  1. Governing parties are not inherently mutually exclusive parties.
  2. This Agreement is enforced by the Sacred Consensus, the immutable authority of the Shadow Executive, the Clerk of Records, and the OLCM.